being with the unknown path
As I write this I am on the cusp of a big transition in my life, moving into more direction and energy focused fully toward my purpose in the world. I feel a sense of excitement and a big deep love as I make this decision and write this. I feel a sense of inevitability, like there is nothing else I could do right now. When I feel into any other possibility I feel intense anxiety and constriction in my chest. And yet, as I feel into the path of purpose, I feel a big sense of the unknown. I don’t know what it is supposed to or going to look like. I have lots of visions for how I want it to go or to be, but I don’t know what is truly right or where my trust in my heart, spirit, and intuition will lead me. It has taken me a long time to come to trust the unknown, but I know it is also where I thrive, and what I love. I actually love the sensation of not knowing and surfing the wave of the present moment, watching the divine intelligence and coordination unfold in the present moment. From small things to large things.. right now for me, it feels like large things.. where I will go, what I will do.. the “details” of how I will be dedicating myself to my personal path and purpose. But I’m so excited for this adventure!! I remember.. This is what I have always wanted, to set out on an adventure of faith and freedom and listening, freedom in the moment to go where I need to go, where I feel called, to trust that I will be led to the right places. To trust. I love this moment of not knowing, even though sometimes my brain so desperately searches for stability and knowing. I love the sensation of feeling wide open to the possibilities. I feel grateful for this opportunity. I feel a deep sensation of well-being and joy.
As I dropped in my heart, tears came to my face. I feel so close to this sharing, I am currently also navigating in this place and find it really interesting this sense of trust and following this unknown, it also makes me feel uneasy and its because where I am everything is so structured and happy as it is, yet this heart is longing for more and that is the beauty to follow this vast heart and to learn as we go.
My heart feels wide open and its because I can see that this process its not easy yet one that I choose to be on everyday.
Thank you for sharing this Rachel for sharing this process that is so alive, for sharing your trust in this unknown and how you are coping with this. Amidst everything else that is surfacing I can also feel gratitude, the sensation of well being and joy. We are loved, protected and taken cared of. I love you <3