Dealing with the pressure to be your parent’s caregiver within a large family
I am the youngest of five siblings, and the only one that is unmarried with no children. Now that my father is suddenly an aging widower (two years ago), I am getting subtle pressure from my siblings to be his caregiver, although I do not live in the city where they all live. Actually I am not a fan of city living. It makes more sense to me for them to hire a caregiver and still pitch in since they all live within 20 minutes of him (three of them actually). I and one other sibling live a day’s trip away. I visit a couple of times a year and stay for at least two weeks each time to help out and provide company and emotional support. And in the interim I call every week and keep in touch by e-mail weekly as well. My siblings seem to think I am indispensable since I live a free-spirited care-free life in their eyes. Yet we are all living the lives we choose to live. I don’t think I should have to uproot my whole life to be our father’s caregiver and just be miserable in the process as I dislike city living. Of course if I was the only one, I would do it in a heartbeat. Yet there are five of us, and three live in the same city as him, all within a 20-minute drive. Am I the only one that sees the logic here?