Triggered old story ending in gratitude
Yesterday I got triggered. An old wound surfaced. Someone was struggling themself, and focused on me asking in a demeaning way “what is wrong with you…?” I did my best and could see the person’s own pain, yet the focus was on me. I listened to them, and fortunately it ended fairly soon. Even though I knew better, I did find myself in that old place wondering what is wrong with me, and you just don’t fit in… on and on. Several times during the course of the day, I asked myself to Stop and sit with myself. Each time I felt a huge contraction in my center gut permeating through my whole body to a cowering position. I breathed into this, breathing in the fresh present air, and breathing out the stale toxicity. I needed to do this several times. Dropping into my heart space, I called on my strong, nurturing, caring and confident parent self. Of course she knew just how to hold me and comfort me, and tell me how I am just so perfect just the way I am. I end feeling the expansiveness of my being, who I really am. I am so grateful for this process, and I am also grateful for the opportunity to nurture this wound needing my care.
I enjoyed seeing you all last evening, despite my not being fully present. I look forward to our next meeting. Thank you all.